My neighbor is a conspiracy theorist about COVID and now I don't want to talk to her?
I have had a friendly relationship with my neighbors who are an elderly couple. We don't have a lot in common but we occasionally swap vegetables and plants and chat about the town across our driveway. I have read her posts on social media that I believe are outlandish - and dangerous - about COVID being a hoax orchestrated by Bill Gates. And now I find myself avoiding her. If I really believe in free speech, then why can't I get over it?
Answers ( 2 )
I think you are being a bit too hard on yourself...and your neighbor. The first thing you need to remember is, she comes from a completely different generation than you. She doesn't have to believe everything you do to be friendly to each other.
We are existing in a very scary time. Everyone is scared. No one has the answers so it is making us turn to electronics even more for information. We need that control. I'm as guilty as the next person. I spend way more time than needed on Facebook, Tik Tok, Instagram, etc. I used them as an escape from the real world. I found myself not sleeping as well, not taking care of my mental health, and eating everything in sight out of boredom. Such a waste of time.
I now have multiple "activities" I keep around my home when I need that mental break. I have books (not online), crossword puzzles, cross-stitching kits, nail polish kits, etc. Even just colored pens with plain paper (for doodling).
When we distract our thought process with something positive, the negative feeling goes away. We are not programmed to be happy and angry at the same time.
Lastly, please remember that if you had an emergency, could you reach out to this neighbor for help? Could she rely on you? This is not the time to create enemies over a belief. Keep each other safe by being kind. That's all.
I've come to this question a year later than it was asked. And I have a very different opinion of what this entails. Your neighbor, this elderly couple does indeed come from another generation, but one that knew and lived through other epidemics and pandemic. They lived in a time without vaccines, with high death rates from diseases we near eradicated in the time they live. So, I do not find that they can be forgiven their conspiracy theories, they lived learning and knowing full well the dangers and risks. I'm afraid they've been manipulated by a campaign of lies and deceit, and that they've been led into these beliefs, and that they are spreading them further makes them perpetrators of fraud and deceit. It is incomprehensible their falling for the conspiracy theory. Elderly are often perceived as more vulnerable to scams, so I blame politics for their own dangerous beliefs.
It's certainly understandable not to want to listen to or associate with someone whose views are so different, so abhorrent. And this is not an issue of free speech. While they can have their own opinion, you do not have to listen to it or tolerate it. Free speech does not mean you have to hear it. Free speech simply means that the government can't censor you, not that you have to accept it. We do not have to suffer fool's words. And even though they may be nice people otherwise, these words are words you don't agree with, you may know to be false, and you certainly don't have to get over it. You may still enjoy a word once in awhile, but there's a huge breach of understanding here, that's dangerous that they keep perpetuating. It's certainly understandable you want to avoid them.
But let's put this into another context - if they were writing about another topic that's so offensive, would you question yourself then - like gay rights, civil rights or pedophilia - I'm sure you wouldn't question yourself there, your feelings would be pretty clear cut. Well, this issue is as damning. So, no, you don't have to get over it.